grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
