we have officially lost it.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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