I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
