But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
