We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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