My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
