I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
