She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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