when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
