If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize