physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
