I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm having to shit out rocks
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize