and you said cock pushups were impossible
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
