Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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