puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
