I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
