The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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