I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
