You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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