i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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