and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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