Christians are straight up FREAKS
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
