I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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