What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Boobs are out for the taking
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
