She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
