I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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