The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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