Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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