did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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