It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
