Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
