Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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