you're like a bully in the Christmas story
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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