There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
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