What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
