We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize