Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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