lets start a swedish sibling band together
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
a search helicopter?!
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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