you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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