I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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