my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize