she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize