just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize