Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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