Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
