when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
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