Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
