i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
