I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
