I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize